Hold on! This is a really dicey topic right? It has been a point of argument for the female and male gender over the years. Being that, there is a theory that says men are polygamous and women are not or should not be, based on their biology or nature.
This has been an excuse for cheating and polygamy for men, and women in a bid of wanting to proof the fact that this theory is false and that one can stay without swinging, decided most recently to take on the polygamous role. Now in some countries, women are marrying more than one man and even in dating. It is commonly seen that there are ladies that have more than one man under their wing. Not just that, they have histories of a long line of men they have been involved with. Now this is not peculiar to women as men have been foremost at this endeavor.
But today is not about the men, today is about women. What are the troubles that comes with having a high body count. That is a long list of men you have been involved with sexually.
The African society seems to favour men more often than women. Because of this, they excuse the fact that a man can go along with the number of women he chooses to but definitely not the same for a woman. Infact, if a woman cheats on her man, it’s like a premeditated murder for the man, a very serious issue, the man thinks of getting rid of such woman immediately, she’s never Worthy of being with such man. For her to cheat, it means she has to get to a certain level of mental space to be able to do that, “ as seen by the society” but if man does same, the reverse will definitely be the case. They state that a woman is supposed to be chaste, naive and kept for her husband. In a situation where she has been involved with two or three men before getting married, there is a high chance of getting stigmatized not just by her husband to be family but by the society at large.
The society tends to consider her as “used” item and not desired. It takes an enlightened mind to see past a person’s history and to know that that does not define the present state of a person. Because of this, it is always advisable a woman does not swing like a man, especially in the African society.
2. Emotional Ties:
Based on the construct of women, it is wise to say that a woman will not give herself to another if she does not love, trust or find security in the person. Often, there is a high chance that a lady still has emotions for one or two of the persons she has been involved with. This is why most ladies cheat on their current partners with their “exes”. Even though sleeping around is business for the lady, it does not take away the fact that emotions do come in at some point. This makes it troublesome and it becomes a problem if it is not taken care of.
3. Trust Issues:
When it comes to relationships, what binds two people to each other apart from love, is the level of trust they have for each other. Now, this may a problem for a lady with her current relationship, especially if she has an insecure partner. Any misunderstanding might make him think that she is cheating.
Often it gets worse that the man constantly throws her past in her face when there is an issue. An insecure person might find it hard to believe that his partner has changed even though she is making efforts to do so. This becomes worrisome, and with time strains a relationship. Without trust, there is nothing to hold to in a relationship, whether romantic or platonic.
There are cases where partners come back to threaten the women to get back to them, even though these women have moved on with their lives.This often proves effective especially if the lady kept her previous relationships from their current partners. If they pressure gets to them, they succumb especially when the person blackmailing them has some evidence of their escapades like sex tapes, pictures or chats.
5. Low Self Esteem:
QBreak-ups are usually different for each person. For some ladies, the constant moving on to a new partner is just to find an emotional bank, to augment for the ones they’ve been bankrupt of. Maybe their partner was verbally abusive to them, it rubs off on their person and they end up loosing their self esteem. This is because people (especially women) usually value the opinions of those they love.
This article is in no way exalting the fact that men should go on philandering, instead it is saying that before making any decision, one should consider the consequences and weigh the odds if they are in their favour. And if it isn’t, then they could prepare themselves on how to deal with the resultant effects of their actions if they do decide to make a decision that has a negative outlook.