The moment a couple get married, “womb watchers” begin to look out for the wife’s tummy and some insensitive bunch will even go ahead to ask her when she wants to take in for her husband; not minding her state of mind at the moment. What these people fail to realize is that some newlyweds deliberately put a hold on childbearing for reasons best known to them, while some may actually be having difficulties with taking in. Most of the blame is hinged on the woman because, she’s the one that bears the burden of carrying a child (or, children) in her womb.
Sometimes, families mount undue pressure on the woman to take in for their son or, she may be termed as a witch that ate all of her children. Some will even go ahead to tag the woman as a man because, saying “two men can’t live in one house”. Time and chance happens to everything in life and, everyone can’t tread the same path. For newlyweds, its a different ball game because they have to deal with pressures from every side. The only thing that can keep them together is if they decide not to let what outsiders say about their predicament get to them. In the event that a couple is yet to bear their own children, they can try out several options like IVF (In-Vitro Fertilization), artificial insemination, legal adoption amongst others. Both parties have to be in agreement before this can eventually pull through.
While waiting to get pregnant, awaiting couples should first learn to shut their ears to distractions and naysayers because, truth is, their opinion doesn’t and will never matter. They should stand with, by and for each other at all times; regardless of what’s going on. They should love each other and treat each other kindly; even on the days when they don’t feel like it. Doing this will help them strengthen the bond of love that they share. This is because couples go through hell while trying to conceive and, in most cases, their attempts flop. They have to do several IVF procedures and, most of the time, it doesn’t pull through. Tension everywhere. Hopes lost. And, sometimes when they eventually manage to conceive, they miscarry the pregnancy! Consequently making the whole process a turmoil for them.
The couple in this picture – (Mr Tosin and Mrs Tomike Adeoye) got married in 2019 and, two years after, they’re expecting their first child together. Nollywood actress, Kemi Akindoju-Fregene and, her husband, Gbugbemi Fregene, got married mid 2018 and, just last month, they welcomed their first child after 3 years. Nollywood actress, Adesua Etomi-Wellington and, her music superstar husband, Banky Wellington, got married in November 2017 and, on 22nd January 2021, they welcomed their first child together after almost 4 years of waiting. These couples obviously must’ve had the worst of times while waiting for children to come; not to forget the constant bashing they got from both inside and outside sources. People don’t bother anymore what couples go through whole expecting children and, it makes no sense that they throw tantrums at them at every given opportunity.
Childbearing is a thing of joy to be experienced but, if it isn’t happening early for you, you don’t need to worry yourself to death. Try out several other conception methods and, if you and your partner are cool with it, go ahead and adopt a baby. Spend time with your partner and keep reminding each other of the love you share. Buy each other gifts and speak kindly to each other; no matter how tensed or worked up you are. This will create a warm, serene and enabling environment for the love you both share to grow stronger and for your body systems to be more calmer and stable. Stress and anxiety, most of the time, can lead to increased chances of infertility. When your mind is at peace and your body, at rest, “THINGS WILL HAPPEN!” Most importantly, pray with and for your partner ALL the time. Invite God into the situation and, let him work things out for you.